


Luck of the Irish

by Dolevalan



Series: Nothing in the Verse [2]
Category: Artemis Fowl - Eoin Colfer, Doctor Who (2005), Firefly
Genre: Crossover, Gen, repost
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-02-15
Updated: 2009-02-15
Packaged: 2018-04-04 06:27:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4128237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dolevalan/pseuds/Dolevalan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kaylee gets to see Earth-That-Was, and Holly Short is sloppy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Luck of the Irish

"I can't get over it. It's so green!" Kaylee grinned. "Don't think I've ever seen so much green all together in one place in my life before."  
  
He smiled back, hands in his pockets. "They call it the 'emerald isle,' you know. Well, some people do at least." The Doctor glanced at Martha. "Isn't that right?"  
  
"Oh, yes. Known for Guinness, religious wars, and alcoholic poets," Martha half grumbled, but her mood had been improving of late. She'd been getting used to sharing the Doctor, helped by the fact that Kaylee's enthusiasm was contagious. It was hard to resent the mechanic too much.  
  
"I still can't believe this is Earth-that-was. It's so crazy. I just want to...roll on the grass so I'll smell like it when we leave." She spun around to face the other two. "When are we, exactly?"  
  
"Um..." The Doctor scratched the back of his neck. "Year 2000?"  
  
"What's in the year 2000, in particular?" Martha asked.  
  
He shrugged. "Don't know. Random TARDIS choice. Besides, does it really matter what year it is, when we're out in the middle of the country? Lovely day, lovely mountainside, lovely...rocks..."  
  
"Allons-y, then, right?" Kaylee beamed.   
  
"Exactly. Allons-y." The Doctor grinned back.   
  
Martha was about to say something in response when a flash of blue light zipped across their vision. "Hello. What's that, then?"  
  
"Huh." The Doctor pulled out his glasses, crouching where something had dropped . "That's...different."  
  
Kaylee and Martha both came to his side. Kaylee looked closer. "What is that?"  
  
"Not sure yet." He pulled out his sonic screwdriver and scanned it. "...huh."  
  
\--  
  
Holly wasn't usually so careless. She'd gotten lax, after a few months where nothing went wrong. She was waiting for something else to pop up with the Mud Boy, and the meanwhile had almost run directly into three Mud People tramping through the countryside. _Lovely, Captain Short,_ she thought. _Root would have a holiday, tearing you a new one for something so dumb._ She checked her equipment and groaned. Her buzz baton was missing. Which meant her choices were going back to find it, or enduring a lecture from Foaly about losing equipment.  
  
Going back it was.  
  
\--  
  
"Can I see it?" Kaylee asked. The Doctor reached to hand it to her, but she said "No! Not... that'd turn it on, see?"  
  
Martha glanced at Kaylee. "You've seen one of these before?"  
  
"No. It just... just seems obvious, is all." Kaylee crouched down and picked it up, carefully at the other end.  
  
"Yes, well. Obvious," the Doctor grumbled, standing up. Martha smiled at him and shook her head before looking back to Kaylee.  
  
"This is really neat. It's a little weapon, like for a kid. At first, you think it's just like a club or a cudgel or somethin' like, but it's got a little switch, here." She flicked it on, and there was a soft hum. "Spiffy power source - never seen something exactly like it. But it should deliver you a little zap." She grinned. "Nothing as'd kill you, probably wouldn't even knock out a grown up, but it'd sting."  
  
"Yes but..." The Doctor frowned.  
  
"Don't be a sore scientist, Doctor. Sometimes you don't always think of the cleverest thing." Martha smiled a bit.  
  
"No, no no. I mean yes, sometimes I... but no! Humans shouldn't have developed anything this advanced by now. I mean," he looks to Martha, "You lot are still using alkaline batteries, right?"  
  
Martha put one hand on her hip. "Hey, now, 'my lot' have done alright. Why, what kind of power is it?"  
  
Kaylee looked up. "I think it's some form of nuclear." She looked to the Doctor. "Right?"  
  
\--  
  
After she made sure her shield was solid, Holly went back over her path. It led her, of course, right back to the Mud People. Under her breath, she cursed expressively. They'd picked up her buzz baton. One of the Mud Women was holding it (miraculously, holding it correctly), while the Mud Man ran his hand through his already unruly hair. Something was odd about him. But now the question was how she was going to get it back and keep this from progressing into a full scale disaster.  
  
\--  
  
" _Nuclear_?" Martha asked. "But it's tiny."  
  
"Yeah." The Doctor asked Kaylee, "See what I mean? Out of time. So... whose is it I wonder? I could always take it back and scan it, I suppose."  
  
"Maybe whoever it is will be coming back for it?" Kaylee suggested.   
  
"Who in the world would use nuclear power for a child-size weapon?" Martha asked.   
  
"Maybe it's not child-sized," the Doctor mused. "Maybe it's adult sized for something non-human. Though..."  
  
"If we leave it here, maybe whatever dropped it will come back?" Martha suggested.  
  
"Could be."  
  
"Sure enough. I'm sure they'll be missin' it," Kaylee said, powering the stick off and replacing it on the ground. "And no way we'll know who to return it to, considerin'."  
  
\--  
  
Holly frowned. They were clearly setting a trap for her. But they just as clearly had no idea about fairies. It was likely should could get in and out without being detected. Likely, but not certain.   
  
\--  
  
"You don't think it's some sort of invasion, do you Doctor?"  
  
The Doctor shook his head. "It doesn't fit. Can't be...no they would have..." He devolved into mumbling under his breath.   
  
"Look." Kaylee took his arm. "Let's just go off a little ways and wait to see what comes, huh? Shouldn't be too long a wait."  
  
"What? Oh, yes. Maybe. Of course, if they've enough technology..."   
  
"Well, we can't very well just stand here all day." Martha crossed her arms. "Let's just wait and see."  
  
\--  
  
As much as Holly didn't want to trust it, this was going to be her best window. The Mud People were clumsily hidden, but hadn't moved for the best part of twenty minutes. And she couldn't afford to sit on her hands, burning through her shield. With a quick prayer that Foaly's innovations wouldn't fail her, she zipped out to where they'd left her buzz baton. She knew there'd be a shimmer in the air, but most Mud People didn't have eyes that good.  
  
\--   
  
"Aha!" The Doctor said under his breath. "Shielding device! Of course, it would have left a little residue, if it's got the same power source, but..."  
  
Martha asked Kaylee, "Did you see anything?"  
  
"No. Just the thingamagig disappearing."  
  
"You wouldn't, it's a high frequency displacement." The Doctor was grinning again. "Oh, who are _you_? You're fantastic."  
  
\--   
  
Holly didn't start breathing again properly until she was a mile away. Who could tell why Mud People did anything, but that had been far, far too close. Sternly, she told herself that she would be in check from now on. The Fowl boy wasn't the only Mud Person to keep an eye on. And she could have lost her badge out of sheer carelessness. The LEP-recon force had little sense of humor about mistakes.   
  
But.  
  
No harm done. And no more joyrides in her new suit.  
  
\--  
  
They walked up to where the baton had been. "Where'd it go?" Martha asked.  
  
"Weeell." He tilted his head. "No way to be sure, of course, but I'd wager its owner picked it back up, just like Kaylee said."  
  
Kaylee tilted her head the other way. "Without us seeing. Pretty smooth trick."  
  
"What could have gotten it in the middle of a field without us seeing?" Martha asked.  
  
"Technology good enough to run a stick on nuclear power, I'd wager." The Doctor grinned. "Luck of the Irish indeed. And here I always though thought that was just a rumor. Bet it was a leprechaun."  
  
"Next thing I know, you'll be telling me there's a Loch Ness monster, too," Martha said, dryly.  
  
"Course there is. Well, monster's a bit harsh, but..." The Doctor gave her that half-crazed, enthusiastic smile Martha could never gauge properly. "Come on. Let's finish our walk. Young Kaylee needs some more green, right? Off we go."  
  
Martha looked at Kaylee, who just rolled her eyes and smiled. They both knew they weren't going to get any more on the subject. Leprechauns would have to do.


End file.
